We met when I was a big mess...I just came out of the hospital after almost losing my life, as I took a long flight without a travel clearance for my TBI and was practically sick, can't walk and feeling like an invalid. I first saw you when my cousin's husband wheeled me inside their villa at Al Barari. I heard you talking to my cousin, Cleo, in Arabic and you were looking at me with your eyebrows twitched. You were wearing a brown cargo pants and a white shirt and I saw the stethoscope on your neck.
I was already inside the room and was about to be brought to the bed when Cleo told me that you were the nurse that they hired to take care and look after me while I'm recovering. You smiled and told me your name. I did not move and did not speak. I was merely looking at you. And then you said to my cousin, he's a snob.
The next day, you came to me and told me, "look I was hired to look after you and help you with your recovery, I am not your maid I am your nurse. So don't make things difficult for both of us". And I was just looking at you while you speak and notice the "dimples" on both of your cheeks. Nice set of teeth too. I was lost in my thought when I heard your voice booming inside my ear, "Mr Croft, did you hear my instructions?" I was startled and admitted that I didn't. So you showed me the list of medicines, the therapy schedules, the food that I could and could not eat at the moment, the scheduled check up at the hospital. And your schedule---three times a week, but if there's an emergency you can be contacted anytime. And all other things which I could no longer remember as I smelled your scent, which is so feminine and sweet. I then learned that it was Roja London Elixir Pour Femme.
The succeeding days were normal. We were very civil. I can feel the awkwardness at times and to be honest, at first, I felt uncomfortable whenever you need to touch my arm and finger to get blood. Then that moment when I need to get my urine for urinalysis. I had a difficult time moving my wheelchair in going to the comfort room and I heard you said "need help" which I screamed "No!" You scolded me and said, "Mr Croft, I was offering to help you move your wheelchair, don't shout at me". Felt so bad and had to apologized. The first few weeks with you, I was rough, unappreciative, cold and unfocus.
One time, you wheeled me into the green area and you asked me why I travelled to Dubai without a travel clearance from my doctors and without informing my family. I just told you that I was beating a deadline. As days progress we started to feel comfortable with each others' presence and began to share stories about our family. We will eat lunch and dinner together and pray together. When I spiked a fever and had a terrible pain in my head, you stayed and took good care of me. Well, I was thinking, that's your job, and I don't want to think of other things. But there were times when you would stay with me when you know that I needed someone to talk to, even if its already hours after your "duty".
Based on the information that you provided plus the stories from Cleo, you are not just an ordinary nurse. You were studying to be a doctor and your family is quite well off. Your dad is a well known doctor too. You actually don't need a job to survive in Dubai but you said you want to have your own money.
I am thankful that you've listened to me without judging me. You prayed with me and you've helped me understand and see things in a different perspective. You were there when I cried my heart out due to frustrations, false hopes and heart break. You stayed with me when I was losing hope. I know our connection moved from being nurse-patient to friendship and I am thankful for that.
I am moving on from the most painful experience of my life and my heart is still healing...and you are too, and just like what we have agreed, we will pray for each other and we will heal together....
And yes, we are getting to know each other.... a little too well....
Happy Birthday Danni!
Mi big brother, Zach. Estoy muy agradecido con el Señor por darme un hermano como tú. Aprecio tu amor y tus sacrificios por mí. Siempre estás ahí cuando te necesito. Estoy agradecido por todo lo que has hecho y sigues haciendo por mí. Rezo por buena salud, larga vida y más momentos felices con tu familia. Yo también siempre estaré aquí para ti. Siempre recordaré tus consejos. Gracias de nuevo Kuya
....solo en pequeños momentos cuando algo bueno pasa y casi agarro mi teléfono para contártelo solo para darme cuenta de que ya no hablamos y que ya me has cortado de tu vida....
Hubo momentos en los que pasas por mis pensamientos y todo lo que quiero es detener mi corazón y mi mente por sentirme así....
sé que estoy progresando... pero de vez en cuando... esto pasa... y juro que ya no quiero sentirme así... no quiero pensar en ti... no quiero extrañarte...
sanar es extraño... seguir adelante es difícil y confuso....
y acabo de darme cuenta... no olvidas a alguien que has amado con cada parte de ti... solo aprendes a vivir rodeado de su ausencia...
